Adrift II - Missing Scene
by Darse
Summary: Scene picks up at the end when Mac shows up at Harm's door after the phone conversation following Mic's departure at the airport. Harm has just asked Mac if she'll be okay while he goes with Renee to her father's funeral. Mac answers . . .)


Adrift II - Missing Scene  
  
October 8, 2001  
  
by Darse  
  
Rating: PG - Mac/Harm  
  
Notes: Scene picks up at the end when Mac shows up at Harm's door after the phone conversation following Mic's departure at the airport. Harm has just asked Mac if she'll be okay while he goes with Renee to her father's funeral. Mac answers . . .)  
  
More Notes: [ ] denotes thoughts the characters are having.  
  
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"I will be . . . when you get back."  
  
Harm opened his mouth to say something, but Renee began to stir on the couch. He quickly glanced Renee's direction to make sure she was still sleeping. Harm already felt bad enough about the events unfolding, but the fact that he and Mac must wait even longer before finally talking was tearing him up inside. Mac, always the strong one, understood Harm's turmoil and offered her understanding at Harm's need to be there for Renee, but the look of disappointment and sadness that washed over her face was unmistakable.  
  
Harm, completely frustrated about the timing of events, gazed into Macs eyes wishing they were anywhere but a few feet from where Renee lay resting.  
  
[This can't be happening], thought Harm. [Can't it be simple . . . just once for Mac and me?]  
  
Mac returned Harm's look of helplessness at the situation, then reluctantly turned and walked toward the elevator.  
  
Harm, not wanting to upset Renee, but fearing he would lose Mac forever this time, stepped quickly and quietly out into the hall, pulling the door shut behind him. He caught Mac by the elbow and turned her around to face him. "Mac, wait . . ."  
  
Tears were already pooling in Mac's eyes, wrenching Harm's heart even more.  
  
"Harm, I should go . . ." she began to say. But Harm cut her off.  
  
"Mac, I'm sorry. . . I'm so sorry. I don't want you to go . . ., but I don't know what else to do here," the last words falling from his lips in a choked whisper. His hands gently caressing her shoulders and down her arms as he spoke. Mac's face mirrored Harm's look of desperation as the tears gave way and flowed freely down her face. Harm reached up with both of his hands and wiped her tears with his thumbs. "Please . . . don't cry."  
  
"You should go back in, Harm. Renee needs you," Mac spoke between sniffles as she lifted her eyes to meet his.  
  
Harm fought back the tears in his own eyes as he blurted out in a desperate plea, "I need YOU."  
  
Before Harm could finish, Mac placed her left hand on Harm's chest as her right index finger brushed his lips to silence him. Whispering, "Shhhhhh . . . I know." Harm's eyes fell from Mac's gaze to her lips - those perfect, full, lips now trying to soothe the pain they both felt.  
  
Harm bent over her and rested his forehead against hers. Mac's hand fell from his lips to cover his heart. It was beating as fast as hers. They both closed their eyes, reveling in the closeness of one another. But it would have to wait. . .for now.  
  
[Dammit - will there ever be a "right" time for us?] Mac couldn't help but wonder.  
  
Harm could no longer think rationally due to the close proximity of the woman to whom he had closed himself off for so many years. But now, he had finally made the resolve to "let go" only to have cruel fate step in and deny them the one thing of which they were both certain they wanted: a chance at a life together.  
  
Mac backed away slightly to look into Harm's eyes. His lips brushed against her forehead. He slowly leaned toward her, his hands brushing up her arms, over her shoulders, and resting on either side of her face. He paused a brief moment to look into her eyes once more. He then lightly kissed one tear-stained cheek, then the other. The distance between them closed and their lips touched in the gentlest of kisses.  
  
As much as they both wanted to simply lose themselves in each other, this was neither the time nor the place. They each drew back, and as they looked into each other's eyes, there was something new there: hope. Hope that had been squashed time and time again throughout their relationship, but now things were different. This time, they both knew that they were finally on their way.  
  
"You know, if this weren't so sad, it would be funny," Mac said with a slight smile. "We've got our own little soap opera going on here."  
  
Harm let out a little laugh then pulled her to him and enveloped her in his arms. Her arms slid around his waist and she laid her head on his chest as he rested his chin on top of her head. They both breathed a sigh of contentment in finally being able to just hold one another, knowing that they would soon be able to talk.  
  
"Another simple thing made complicated, huh?" Mac said half sarcastically.  
  
Harm pulled back with a questioning glare, slightly offended at Mac's statement, thinking she meant he was the one making this difficult. But when he looked into her face, she simply smiled. And though the smile did not quite reach her eyes, Harm knew she was not upset with him, just disappointed. He returned her smile.  
  
"I don't know what's going to happen the next few days, but I do know that when I get back, I am coming straight to you," Harm revealed, surprising himself a little at the boldness of his statement.  
  
Mac tilted her head and gave him that questioning look of hers. God he loved the way she raised her eyebrow and pursed her lips together.  
  
"I've been an idiot, Mac . . .but I am ready to take the chance that I think we've both wanted for so long, but were too afraid to take, " Harm spoke with the greatest sincerity. "This whole near-death thing, and you almost marrying another man. . .it's all been so . . . so damn confusing. I mean, all these feelings I have for you - they wouldn't go away. I thought I could be happy knowing that you were happy. . .even if it meant you marrying Brumby. But, God, all I could think of when I was out there in the ocean was how much I wanted you. . .how much I want to be with you, how stupid I've been . . .I'm babbling here," he said with a shy grin.  
  
Mac smiled at his rare lack of composure. Harm, barely taking a breath, continued before Mac could say anything, "This is not coming out like I had intended . . . I thought we'd have time to talk and sort this all out, but now that you're here, and all this with Renee - I just don't want to miss this opportunity again - the chance to be with you. I can't. You were right that night on the Admiral's porch . . .about me being afraid of losing control . . . control over my feelings for you. Sarah Mackenzie, you are looking at the new and enlightened Harmon Rabb, Jr., the man who has long since lost control over his feelings for a certain beautiful marine colonel and isn't afraid to tell her anymore." He paused a moment, then added, "I take that back . . ."  
  
Mac, whose mouth had dropped open slightly in sheer awe of the words spilling from Harm's heart, pursed her lips together again with a sudden look of uncertainty, fearing that Harm was now recanting his heartfelt confession.  
  
"I take it back . . .I am scared to death" he completed his thought with a half-grin, half-embarrassed look. "I'm sailing in uncharted waters here."  
  
There, he'd said it. Maybe not in the most eloquent of ways, but he'd hopefully gotten his point across. Now he waited for some sort of response from Mac. She stood there, speechless for what seemed an eternity.  
  
His face reminded her of the school nerd declaring his love to the prom queen. Such vulnerability - and Harm of all people - Mac never expected this. I mean, sure she had a hint of Harm's feelings. [Why else would he have told me he was waiting for me to come to him?]. She had heard it in his voice during that conversation - he was ready to let go. But, wow, she wasn't expecting him to just blurt it all out at once. [This is Harm we're talking about here. Mr. "I can't express my emotions."] The best she had hoped for was a gradual easing into a relationship with Harm; taking it slowly so as not to scare him away.  
  
"Aren't you going to say something?" Harm asked rather impatiently while Mac simply stared back at him with an incredulous expression on her face. It took all the self-control Mac could muster to keep from jumping into his arms right then and there. A million thoughts raced through her mind, the predominant one being whether this moment was really real or just a dream. Mac soon recovered from her moment of despondency, however.  
  
"Uhmmmmm . . .no," she said with a sly grin as she stretched up on her toes and placed her lips over his in a not-so-innocent kiss. Her fingers slid through his hair and rested on the back of his neck. Harm, taken by surprise, did not hesitate long before reacting to Mac's forwardness. Now it was his turn to wonder if this moment was real or not.  
  
[Oh. . . this is definitely real. Definitely real] As his hands freely roamed her back, he desperately pulled her closer crushing her body against his. "Mac . . . ." he whispered against her lips. Mac continued her assault on him for a few more seconds, preventing Harm from saying anything else. She pulled back and their eyes locked. An entire conversation transpired in those moments of silence. Yes, it was definitely there - hope. Hope for a future together.Again, their foreheads came to rest together and they closed their eyes. They each took deep breaths and released them in an effort to gain control over the situation unfolding.  
  
"Enough said?" Mac said with a beaming, yet mischievous smile.  
  
Harm's flyboy grin spread across his face, "Not nearly enough . . .but, we will definitely continue this conversation later." A flash of sadness crossed his face as he remembered Renee was in his apartment. Harm dreaded the next few days with her. He didn't know how he was going to tell Renee, but there could be no more pretending. After this "stolen moment" with Mac, there was no denying that Mac was indeed his "dream girl".  
  
"Mac . . .Sarah . . .I want to be with you, you do know that don't you?" Harm looked intently into her eyes as he took both of her hands in his. It was as if Harm was pleading with her to wait for him to resolve things with Renee.  
  
Mac pulled his hands behind her back and rested them at her waist while her hands moved to lovingly caress his face. "I have a pretty good idea . . .now. I've waited this long," she said in a mildly sarcastic tone, " . . .what's a few more days."  
  
With that Harm pulled her into a tight embrace, turning his head toward her so that his breath was on her neck. He slid one hand up to the back of her neck while the other gently rubbed her lower back. He pressed his lips against her neck, then whispered into her ear, "Thank you . . .thank you for understanding. I will be coming back to you, Sarah. No more games, no more hiding, no more waiting. You and I have a lot to talk about." He then kissed her cheek.  
  
Mac pulled reluctantly away from him, but held his gaze. She took his hand in hers and took a few steps backward toward the elevator. Her hand slid out of his as she turned to pull the gate back and walk onto the lift.  
  
Harm stood motionless. He didn't want her to go, but there was no choice at the moment. She turned to face Harm, and before the elevator descended, quietly said, "I'll be waiting." 


End file.
